SOME JOKES HAVE TOO MUCH POWER

Call 911

As I’ve said before, never underestimate the power of a good joke. Two recent examples more than attest to this. The first can be summed up as follows: a Middle Eastern comic jokes about race on stage, then someone in the crowd calls the police.

Earlier this year, on the 11th of May, Egyptian-born American stand-up comedian Ahmed Ahmed (so good I guess his parents named him twice) performed at the Off The Hook Comedy Club in Naples, Florida. Part of his routine involved poking fun at negative stereotypes about Middle Eastern people. He asked the audience “Clap if you’re from the Middle East…All right. We’ve got a handful of us in here, nice. But, hey, it only takes one of us…” And as the audience roared with laughter he waited a beat and finished with “…to tell the joke.” This is a bit that Ahmed has told at least a thousand times around the world, describing it as “silly, sarcastic banter.”

Unfortunately not everyone agrees with this description. Ahmed went on to do his full set and it went well. So far, so good. However, the next day (Mother’s Day no less) a man who attended the show took Ahmed’s performance somewhat too seriously and anonymously called the local sheriff’s department, the Collier County Sheriff’s Office. He thought the joke went too far, so much so he lodged a complaint that the comedian seemed to support terrorism and he wanted to create a terrorist cell in America. The caller was also worried Ahmed would repeat the offensive joke again and again at upcoming shows. The anonymous man explained his reason for calling. “I don’t think that was right. It really bothered me. And I yelled, ‘Yeah, and the paddy wagon is going to be outside to get all of you.’”

After the call was placed the sheriff’s office sent two deputies to address the concern. They arrived at the club later that day and quickly realized the complaint was without merit. Ahmed shared a video online while the police questioned him about the incident. He openly interacted with the deputies. One of them advised him to stay the course. “Don’t change your set. Don’t change a joke. Just go through with it.” Ahmed said the officers were “very polite.” He even invited them to that evening’s show, which they declined.

In a later interview Ahmed said he believed the call was rooted in racism, but he forgave the man and was glad the episode shone a light on Islamophobia. “It was kind of bizarre,” Ahmed expressed. He also said the caller misquoted him. He wrote on Twitter that “I never said ‘We can start our own terrorist organization.'”

As is common in this day and age, the story went worldwide virally. Whilst Ahmed enjoyed his newfound fame, he also realized it wouldn’t last long. He said “No one saw it coming. This call that was made on me has gathered me so much press, I want to thank the guy, thank you so much. He gave me more press than I ever got. You can’t buy this kind of press. Am I toying with people’s emotions, because of Islamophobia, because of what’s going on in the world? Absolutely. That’s what comedy is. It’s supposed to make you think. But it’s 15 minutes of fame that will go away, we all know that. So it’s nice to kind of grab it, shake it up a little bit, put a magnifying glass on it and keep the awareness out there. It’s a larger conversation, it’s a bigger message happening now. It doesn’t even have anything to do with me anymore.”

Ahmed confirmed he was willing to give the anonymous caller two free tickets to his next show, and he also offered the man a “jolly American hug.” He has since performed at the same comedy club again, at the personal request of the owner, Brien Spina.

The second example can be summed up as: an author begrudgingly apologises for a satirical comment she made on a satirical talk show. Recently, on the 17th of May, talk show host Bill Maher interviewed author and former Law & Order actress Fran Lebowitz on his TV program Real Time With Bill Maher. The interview started with Maher asking Lebowitz “The first thing I want to ask you about is Trump. We don’t want to talk about him the whole show but you’re the wisest person I know. I think a lot of people are like me in that they have this dilemma where we don’t want to devote all our time to Trump but we don’t want to be a bad citizen and ignore it. So how do you strike that balance?”

The reply from Lebowitz made her utter disdain for Trump abundantly clear to all. “Are you asking me if I’m sick of thinking about Donald Trump? You cannot imagine how sick I am thinking about Donald Trump. On the other hand, I wouldn’t say I’m thinking about him. He doesn’t really require thought. I would say more I’m plagued by him. It’s like having an awful chronic ailment that you try to ignore. But if you do ignore it for like 20 minutes, like I just said to someone backstage ‘I’ve been here for an hour and I haven’t seen any news. Have we invaded Sweden?’ Because you don’t know what he’s going to do next and that’s why we think about him all the time.”

Later on the subject turned to what should happen to Trump, specifically with regards to impeachment. The always outspoken author was, as always, outspoken. “Here’s where I am on impeachment. I certainly think he deserves to be impeached. Impeachment would be just the beginning of what he deserves. It’s not even scratching the surface of what he deserves. Whenever I think about this and what he really deserves, I think we should turn him over to the Saudis, his buddies, the same Saudis who got rid of that reporter. Maybe they could do the same for him.”

Her comments prompted laughter and shocked gasps from members of the studio audience, before viewers quickly reacted on social media. “That reporter” is Jamal Khashoggi, the Washington Post columnist who, according to the CIA, was tortured and murdered on orders from Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman last year in a Saudi consulate in Istanbul.

Later on in the show, in an online-only segment called Overtime, she apologised for her earlier remarks. Kind of. It seemed obvious to me that both she and Maher were more annoyed that an apology was necessary in the current climate of political correctness and social media reactions. Maher asked her if she was sorry for her earlier remark because it had gone too far. “That’s what the producer said. He said we’re getting blowback on Twitter or something. I saw your face when I said it. I didn’t realise that I said it. I had 12 cups of coffee. I regret saying it.” Maher reiterated simply that “It’s a live show. You don’t really want to see the President dismembered by the Saudis.” Lebowitz said “No, I don’t.” But then, relatively seriously and somewhat sarcastically, she added “I did not mean that, and I regret saying it, and I regret that everyone misinterpreted it because they misinterpret everything. Why should they stop at me?”

Since I clearly love jokes, especially controversial and thought provoking ones, please find below a handpicked selection of humorous quotes that I hope make you think as well as smile and, who knows, some may even make you gasp. Either way, enjoy!

PS Due to some adult language, user discretion is advised. You have been warned!


Every time there is a terrorist attack of any description, I always think two things. The first thing I’m fine with, the second thing I’m embarrassed by, but I want to tell you about in the interest of building empathy. The first thing I think whenever there’s been a terrorist attack is “I hope everyone is okay.” Fine. The second thing I think whenever there’s been a terrorist attack is “OH GOD! PLEASE BE A WHITE GUY! Oh God, I want it to be a white guy so badly.” Every time they’re about to announce the name I’m always like, with fingers crossed, “Come on Graham Johnson!” All I want to hear is “The suspect is known to be a fan of Mumford And Sons and the film La La Land.” That’s all I want to hear. Because when white people kill people no one cares. Everyone’s like “Ah, he was probably hungry. Come on! Maybe his internet was being weird. Let’s not make a big deal out of this.” All I’m saying is there’s a cultural imbalance and I’m just trying to redress it. That’s all I’m saying. There’s a double standard when white people kill people. – Nish Kumar

I got married to an Indian woman. Not casino-Indian but computer-Indian. Basically, I married tech support. Best move I ever made. We have an Iranian-Indian kid in America. How cool is that? That kid’s going to get his ass kicked. The key is you’ve got to give him a good name so he doesn’t get into trouble in America. And that’s what we did, we gave him a good name. We named him Mujibur Mohammed Abdullah Raheem Osama Bin Laden Jobrani. Why? Because I need the material. I’ll be like “Son, how was your day at school? You were deported? Fantastic! I can work that into my act.” – Maz Jobrani, from his 2009 stand up show Brown And Friendly

Joggers. I don’t trust them. They’re the ones who keep finding all the dead bodies. Coincidence? I don’t think so! – Bill Bailey

I don’t know about you guys, but I’ve been getting older recently. I’m 28 now, a Wang’s dozen. All those quintessential trappings of age have started to get me. Like, I’m becoming more right-wing with age. I was hoping that one wouldn’t be true. I know, it’s a real shame, they say you become more right-wing with age, and it turns out that’s true. My political leanings have really changed in the last couple of years. Like, I used to think I was a socialist, but looking back now, I realise I just didn’t have any money. I’ve got money now. I ain’t sharing that shit! That’s mine! Back off, you Commies. Turns out capitalism is OK when you’ve got capital. – Phil Wang

There’s a lot of common misconceptions of Arabs. A lot of people think we are rich, that we are loaded, that all of us have 6 barrels of oil in our basements, and we drive Ferraris while we pet our cheetahs. No! That’s not the case, that’s maybe the top 1% but the rest of us are cheap as hell! – Abdallah Jasim

It is just inherently alarming whenever Trump claims that something is going well. If you ever hear him say “We love this building, don’t we folks? So little fire,” get the f*** out of there, it is about to burn to the ground. – John Oliver, 19 May 2019, from the Last Week Tonight With John Oliver

Pope Francis met with more than 200 Italian Catholic hairstylists and warned them about the temptation of gossip in beauty salons, especially when that gossip is “Did you hear what happened to those altar boys?” – Michael Che, 04 May 2019, from the TV show Saturday Night Live

Pope Francis ended a Vatican summit by promising the Catholic church would confront clergy sex abuse “head-on.” Instead of their usual way: face down, ass up. – Michael Che, 18 May 2019, from the TV show Saturday Night Live

Deciding who is going to be the next Prime Minister is like deciding which toilet to use at a music festival. – Bennett Arron, May 2019, referring to Theresa May resigning

I am Mo. Mo is actually short for Mohammed. Surprise, bitches! Today is the day! Your cell phones are locked up. It’s too late for you, motherf*****s! Get the door, Aziz! No, I’m just kidding…Mohammed is the most popular name in the world, but I can’t find one key chain with my name on it anywhere. Not one person has shared a Coca-Cola with me in America, not a single person…I have a nephew named Osama. What this poor kid had to endure! I hate that fact. There’s so many terrorist acts done by white people, not a single person is changing their kid’s name from being Timothy. It’s insane! This poor kid! This kid has to deal with so much, I can only imagine. – Mo Amer, from his 2018 Netflix special Vagabond

Sensible dialogue has ceased. The alt-right vomit out high-speed soundbites, before lumbering old-school wildebeest journalists can interrupt them with facts, and their followers swiftly repurpose these into potent online propaganda. Traditional resistance is futile. We have entered the Age of the Weaponised Milkshake…the flinging of milkshakes represents a frustration with traditional media’s failure to hold the far right to account. – Stewart Lee, May 2019, referring to Nigel Farage being milkshaked repeatedly during the European election campaign

My name is a Ahamed Weinberg. [Audience laughs] Thank you. My parents wrote that joke. I’m happy to be in Canada, to be out of America, because I’m a white Jewish Muslim vegetarian. My parents are Muslim. A lot of people are scared of Islam, but they’re just normal homophobic parents. Being a white Muslim is an interesting reality. First of all my name’s Ahamed, it’s not Mohammed, which is more confusing. My phone didn’t know what Ahamed was. The first time I typed my name into my phone, I typed ‘Ahamed’ and it immediately autocorrected too ‘Ashamed’. That was a tough moment for me. And then I was like, you know what, I am ashamed. That’s it, that’s right. Because I’m a white Muslim which is weird because I know if I looked Muslim my life would be much harder in America. But I’m white and it’s great! I think that’s the secret, if you want to be Muslim just be white and have red hair and make sure your last name is Weinberg. – Ahamed Weinberg

There was this kid last year in Texas who got arrested for making a clock. His name was Ahmed and he brought a clock to school that he made and they arrested him because they thought it was a bomb. And that really offended me as a Muslim. And then I looked up a picture of his clock…it was a pretty bomby clock. That couldn’t have been more like a bomb, I think. It was in a metal briefcase, it had red and blue wires sticking out of it, and it had computer chips. It was just a classic Rush Hour 2 bomb. And everyone was like ‘Oh, this kid’s a genius’ and he went to the White House. I was like ‘He just made a clock! It was a digital clock. He just took a clock from his dad’s house and made it look like a bomb.’ – Ahamed Weinberg

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Understanding The True Spirit Of Islam

It is clear that Islamophobia is on the rise globally. To counter this, at my own personal level, I keep a keen eye out for articles that speak positively about Islam and Muslims. With that in mind please find below three articles that I hope present a more honest and positive portrayal of Muslims, words that mean more to me than all of the vast amount of anti-Islamic nonsense that the internet is unfortunately teeming with. Enjoy!


Aqsa Prayer


To Say Or Not To Say: The Pitfalls Of Islamophobia

Ruby Usman, 23 Apr 2019, stuff.co.nz

I am only eight or nine. Our small apartment is in the slums of Karachi, Pakistan and we are sitting on the floor having dinner. The radio is turned on and there is a Q&A session going on with a Muslim Imam. In a response to a question, the Imam says that girls shouldn’t go to college or study because their primary duty is to take care of their homes and their husbands and they should stay at home to learn these domestic chores.

This sparks fury in my mother. She says that if women are not educated, how can they raise strong and independent children. My mother continues to fume, and I can tell you that there are a lot of words with ‘f’ in them.

I grew up listening to her critique of these teachings by local imams and learned not to fully accept their ideas unless they made sense to me.

This was okay as long as I was in the house. Once I walked out of our house, things changed. It was the realm of men. They harassed me; they groped my genitals in crowded streets, and they tried to strip me naked with their eyes. My only crime was that I was walking on the street not having covered myself from head to toe – as was the custom – and so, I didn’t deserve their respect.

The anger in me grew in leaps and bounds and so did my aggression. But there wasn’t much I could do.

When I finally left this world of patriarchal aggression, I was full of rebellion. I rebelled against Pakistani men; I rebelled against Pakistani traditions and above all, I rebelled against Islam. For me, it was a repressive and violent religion; a religion where husbands are allowed to hit their wives, and men are allowed to control the women of their household in the name of honour and shame.

I didn’t need that Allah; I didn’t need any Pakistani man who treated me like an inferior. There must be a place for me in the world. There must be a place where I could be free. My search for answers took me to Singapore, Australia and then to Christchurch New Zealand where I have moved only about a couple of months ago.

For those of you who have read my blogs, you might have noticed that I have written a lot about injustices that have happened to me in Pakistan in the name of religion and culture.

Even though writing about these made me feel better because I was exposing the unjust practices of Islam, but I was also wary that I was adding to the “Islamophobia” that has been prevalent on the global stage since 9/11.

I didn’t know how to reconcile this. I didn’t know how not to blame Islam for all that had happened to me in Pakistan. Osama Bin Laden killed thousands of innocent lives and then claimed it all in the name of Allah; in the name of Islam. How could I not say that Islam taught him to be violent?

As you can imagine, I have received ‘virtual beatings’ on social media through my blogs and a few months ago, it all became too much for me. I needed to take a break from my own anger. I stopped blogging.

Since then, I have been finding a way to express my feelings. A way to share my experiences without attacking Islam, or Pakistani men but I have been at a loss.

And then something very drastic happened. On Friday 15 March, a gunman shot innocent Muslims in their places of worship. White supremacy raised its ugly head that day and the gunman claimed his ideology via a manifesto, just like Osama had done years ago.

I had expected Muslims to rebel. I expected Muslims to retaliate and do the same to white Christians. After all, isn’t that what Islam taught them – an eye for an eye?

But instead, something really wonderful happened. I experienced love, compassion and forgiveness from Muslims in a way that I had never experienced before. The word ‘Islam’ means peace, and this is what I saw in the wake of what could have created decades of inter-religious animosity.

That day, for the first time in my life, I understood the true spirit of Islam. My mother’s wisdom shone on me that day. She had only ever questioned people who said unjust things because, in her mind, the religion could never teach such violation of human rights.

But using the name ‘Islam’ gives an unquestioning power to whoever is holding this placard. When a man asks a woman to wear a hijab, she may say no. But if he commands it in the name of Islam – saying no now means going against the wishes of Allah…How could she say no?

When a Muslim scholar tells women that their husband is their ruler because that’s how Allah has designed this world, they have no choice but to oblige. After all, it is the word of God.

What we forget is that humans are only humans. And it is the weak humans who use religion to exact power upon other people. It is not Islam; it is always the person who is using this power to control people in their lives.

In a way, the term ‘Islamophobia’ doesn’t have much meaning at all because it is the people, organisations and the imams who use it as part of their own hunger for power. Holding them accountable has much more power and meaning because we are no longer attacking an ideology, and this means that even Muslims can support us in this fight against these unjust practices.

My personal challenge now is to see Islam separate from those who practice it unjustly. Instead of lashing out in anger, I now need to sit with my own anger and discomfort and reflect until I can see beyond. I hope you can do the same…


Bangladeshi Muslim Children


The Other Side Of ‘Allahu Akbar’

James Jeffrey, 23 Apr 2019, theamericanconservative.com

In his travels through the Mideast and Africa, our writer found mostly peaceful Muslims, kind to a fault and proud of their religion.

I want to talk about those at the center of the mosque shootings that rocked Christchurch over a month ago. Not the poor 50 men and women who were shot dead—with another 50 injured—by a cowardly gunman, but rather about Muslims in general.

For someone who spent his schooling under the guidance of Benedictine monks in a damp North Yorkshire valley in England, mosques under the hot sun, as well as Muslims and Islam, have featured in my life to a surprising degree—and in a very nourishing way.

One of my most memorable encounters with Islam occurred in Iraq in 2004, during a six-month operational tour with the British Army in Al Amarah, a remote sun-blasted city marooned from the country’s main urban focal points, about 230 miles southeast of Baghdad.

Atop the Pink Palace—once the home, before the 2003 invasion and its commandeering by the British Army, of the governor of the surrounding Maysan region—I loved to listen to the Muezzin calling the faithful to prayer on a Friday afternoon. Those holy Arabic words (even though I couldn’t actually understand them) were a serene comfort from the pressures of the tour.

Near the end of what I remember as the hottest, sweatiest, and most exhausting midday foot patrol through the city, I signaled that we should take a knee on the sidewalk. We’d been going for a couple of hours. My CamelBak was empty of water, my lips were cracked, and my shoulders ached from the heavy radio. Suddenly, a wizened old man appeared from a shack off to the side carrying a silver tray with a steaming cup of tea. Slinging my rifle to the side, I took the cup and uttered an Arabic “shukran” in thanks, while the man grinned and nodded. Swirling with sugar particles, the sweet liquid was like a monsoon to my parched insides.

There were other such encounters with the Muslim inhabitants of Al Amarah. Considering what we were visiting on them and their country—with worse yet to come—I found the vast majority of Iraqis extremely gracious, hospitable, and good-humored. They left far more of an impression on me than the insurgents firing RPGs and mortars at us shouting “Allah Akbar!”

After leaving the army, while working as a freelance journalist in Ethiopia, I found myself, despite being in one of the world’s oldest Christian countries, surrounded by even more Muslims. (It’s estimated that nearly 40 percent of Ethiopia’s population are Muslim.)

Yet traveling around the country, I never worried about being robbed or attacked by Muslims. I was far more likely to be pick-pocketed or have a bottle smashed over my head by a fellow Christian.

It’s no coincidence that I often found myself heading towards eastern Ethiopia, the most Muslim part of the country, and then continuing over the border into Djibouti and Somaliland. There I found friendly, peaceful Muslims, who respected my privacy and space.

The three years that I spent in the Horn of Africa watching the humble devotion of Muslims had a role in my reconnecting with my Catholicism. During one reporting trip to Djibouti, I managed to rent a room in a house shared by some foreign NGO workers. I returned in the middle of the day and opened the front door to find their cleaner knelt on the floor, bent double, saying her daily prayers. She was—inexplicably, it seemed—crammed into the corridor directly facing a wall, when there was a nice, spacious, window-lit room just off to the right.

It turned out that she’d refused to use that room, as there were bottles of alcohol on display. She told me this without a touch of haughtiness, humbly, shyly, with faltering English, all the while sweating noticeably beneath her headscarf. It was Ramadan, and she’d not had anything to eat or drink since sunrise.

In Somaliland, I did a story about Muslim women and how they cover up their hair and faces, which undercut some Western assumptions about Islam. All the women I spoke to said they wanted to dress the way they did. One sparklingly sharp young lady explained in erudite English that she didn’t appreciate people in the West telling her that she was being oppressed just because she followed her religion in a way that she believed in.

Somaliland was full of such surprises. It was a freelancer’s dream, especially after the recalcitrance and obstructionism of trying to report in Ethiopia. Somalilanders—like all Somalis—can’t stop talking, and if you ring them up, there is no messing around. Often they’ll agree to meet you within the hour.

After a good day’s work in the capital, Hargeisa, with no bars on hand, I typically joined the men gathered at an open tea house. The only foreigner for miles, I was usually left to my own devices, though sometimes the person next to me would courteously ask where I was from and what had brought me to Somaliland. After I answered, he would finish with a “Welcome to Somaliland, thank you for coming,” or insist on paying for my delicious cup of sweet milky Somali tea.

Of course, none of this is to avoid the elephant in the room—Islam has a serious problem with its notion of jihad. And similar to the Catholic Church’s treatment of clerical child abuse, it hasn’t been willing enough to discuss what ails it. I was reminded of this in Hargeisa one day. Walking down the main drag, I became aware of some noise behind me. The sounds got closer and eventually a bearded young man in a long brown robe appeared in front of my face, jabbering and threatening to punch me. I crossed the road—admittedly a bit shaken, as Hargeisa had always been a friendly place—and looked over to make sure he wasn’t following. I saw him miming firing a machine gun at me. It sounds comical writing about it now. But entirely alone in Hargeisa, it didn’t feel so funny.

That was one man out of hundreds and thousands of friendly Muslims who couldn’t have been more different—and therein lies Islam’s great PR problem in the West. I understand that, yet sometimes I admittedly waver, such as when faced with that gut-wrenching image from 2015 of 34 Christian men lined up kneeling on the beach in orange boiler suits, their hands tied behind them, utterly powerless—reportedly all Ethiopian—each with an ISIS member behind him about to shoot or behead. But then one remembers that each of those armed men aren’t proper Muslims, in the same way that many Christians have behaved in ways that forfeit their right to call themselves Christians.

The day after the Christchurch shootings, I spotted a message on a WhatsApp channel for a Saturday soccer group I played with when living in Austin, Texas. The members are notably international, and one of them expressed his condolences for the Muslims in the group.

I hesitated to contribute my own comment, before seconding the sentiments expressed. I also added what a truly embarrassing day it was to be a Christian.


Palestine Ramadan

Palestinian families break their fast next to a destroyed building during recent confrontations between Hamas and Israel in the Gaza Strip.


Islam: ‘The Last Badass Religion’

Rod Dreher, 28 Feb 2017, theamericanconservative.com

Here’s a great interview by Razib Khan with Shadi Hamid, the Egyptian-American Muslim writer. I love this excerpt:

As for Christianity, I thought about it intellectually, but I didn’t think about it much as something real and lived-in, in part because it’s actually not super easy to meet outwardly and openly Christian people in the generally liberal setting of Bryn Mawr, PA.

I guess, even if subconsciously, this must have had an effect on me – this idea that the Christians I knew generally didn’t seem all that serious about their faith, where at the local mosque it was pretty clear that there were Muslims who were pretty serious about their faith.

I’ve always tried to be careful in how I talk about this, because it can pretty easily be misconstrued, but I remember talking to some friends a couple years back and someone described Islam as the “last badass religion,” which I thought was an interesting turn of phrase.

It’s this part of Islam that helps me understand and even empathize with why some atheists or secularists might be suspicious of Islam.

(But it’s this part of Islam that also helps me understand why Muslims themselves, even those who aren’t particularly religiously observant, seem so attached to the idea of Islam being unusually uncompromising and assertive).

If you’re nominally Christian and you see that your own faith, for whatever reason, can’t compete with Islam’s political resonance, then you might find yourself looking for non-religious forms of ideology which can offer a comparable sense of meaning.

That’s why the rise of Trump as well as the far-right in Europe is so interesting to me; these are fundamentally non-religious movements that are, in some sense, reacting to Islam but also mimicking the sense of certainty and conviction that it provides to its followers.

That’s something I respect about Muslims in general: they take their faith a lot more seriously than we Christians do. The only forms of Christianity that are going to survive the dissolution now upon us are going to be those that are serious about the faith, and incorporate it into disciplined ways of living. What would it mean for Christianity to be “badass”? Not violent, or intimidating, or cruel, but serious and countercultural. This is one reason that Orthodox Christianity is so attractive to men. It sets serious challenges in front of you — fasting, prayer, and so forth — and expects you to rise to the challenge. It’s not rigidly dogmatic and moralistic, certainly, but it’s not sentimental either. It sees the Christian life as a pilgrimage toward God in which we die to ourselves every day. That’s not Moralistic Therapeutic Deism. That is the faith.

Shadi Hamid identifies himself as a political and cultural liberal. His book Islamic Exceptionalism is an attempt to explain what’s happening now in the Muslim world. In previous interviews, he has talked about how Westerners have a bad habit of not taking Muslims at their word about what they believe and what it means. More from the Razib Khan interview:

My bigger issue, though, has to do with political scientists’ unwillingness to take religion seriously as a prime mover. In other words, because most political scientists in the academy aren’t particularly religious or haven’t spent much time around religious people, they usually see religion not as a cause, but rather as something caused by other more tangible, material factors, the things we can touch, feel, and of course measure. So if someone joins an Islamist organization like the Muslim Brotherhood, the tendency is to explain it with things like rural-urban migration, underemployment, poverty, being pissed off at America, the list goes on. Sure, all those things matter, but what does political science have to say about “irrational” things like wanting to get into heaven? It’s not everything, but it’s one important factor that has to taken into account.

This is something that becomes more obvious when you talk to Islamists about why they do what they do. They don’t say, “Hey Shadi, I’m doing this because I want to get into heaven.” It’s more something that you feel and absorb the more you sit down and talk to a Muslim Brotherhood member. It matters to them and it’s something that drives them, especially when they’re deciding to join a sit-in and they’re well aware that the military is about to move in and use live ammunition. It’s not so much that they want to die; it’s more that they are ready to die, and it doesn’t frighten them as much as it might frighten someone else, because they believe there’s a pretty good chance that they’ll be granted paradise especially if they happen to killed while they’re in the middle of an act that they consider to be in the service of God and his message.

Another example: after the failed coup attempt in Turkey last year, President Erdogan said something that raised a lot of eyebrows. He called the coup attempt “a gift from God.” What could he have possibly meant by this? Does that mean he wanted it to happen or even that he was behind his own attempted assassination? No. There’s nothing weird about what he said. There’s no doubt in my mind that Erdogan really believed that this was, quite literally, a gift from God and that God was sending him a somewhat tailored message.

Which brings me back to the question of “rationality.” If you believe in this kind of cosmic universe – a universe where one experiences daily God’s magic, if you will – then sacrificing something in this world for the next is pretty much the most rational thing you can do. After all, this is eternal paradise we’re talking about.

Yes, exactly! If Christianity has lost its sense of purpose and meaning among contemporary Americans, this has a lot to do with the loss of a sense of supernatural reality.

One more quick thing. I admire Hamid’s intellectual and moral courage in not towing a PC line about the Islamic faith:

So, in my new book, there are definitely some ideas and conclusions that I’m not quite comfortable with, which is sometimes a bit of a weird feeling. When the book came out, I was nervous, not just for the usual reasons, but also because there were certain distillations of my argument – the sound bites – which, when I said them, it was almost like I was straining myself. This is an era, perhaps the era, of anti-Muslim bigotry, and I couldn’t bear to think that I was contributing to that. The thing, though, is that I know that I have. But, just the same, I can’t bear the idea of not saying the things I believe to be true just because someone might use it for purposes I find objectionable. To me, the alternative is worse, the whole “Islam is peaceful” nonsense. “Islam is violent” is just as nonsensical, but we don’t fight those stereotypes of Islam by pretending the exact opposite is true.

Read the entire interview. It’s well worth your time. I’m going to have to pick up Hamid’s book. It sounds challenging and important.

Funny, but I feel that in general, I have as much or even more in common with a believing American Muslim than with a modernist American Christian.

UPDATE: Reader Firebird writes:

Your WEIRD bias is showing. A practicing Muslim in the WEST is serious and counter cultural. The vast majority of believing, practicing Muslims are not in any way doing anything countercultural. The exact opposite, in fact.

Having lived in majority Muslim nations, including one that is particularly known for conservatism, I cannot say that I saw a great deal more seriousness from self-identifying Muslims than I do among practicing Christians. I do not see a greater dedication to textual study, or philosophy, etc among the average mosque goer as opposed to the average church goer. The society is simply not as far down the line as we are towards default secularism, so mosque goers make up a bigger proportion of the population.

I do see a stronger societal bias towards conformity and traditions, of which Islam is a part (but by no means all). A perfect example of this is the ongoing dedication to the de facto caste system that exists in Pakistan, which while foreign to Islamic thought, coexists and thrives in the minds of plenty of Pakistani Muslims.

To sum up– practicing Islam is indeed a countercultural, badass statement in the U.K. or California. It is nothing of the sort in most of the Muslim world. In those places, a better analogy would be that practicing Islam is like being a liberal professor at Yale. Expected and enforced through coercion, persuasion, and simple inertia.

No doubt a fair and accurate point.

The Peace You Feel During Ramadan Is Beautiful

Royal Baby

Ramadan started brilliantly this year. The very first day of fasting say a new addition to the British Royal family, when Meghan Markle (the Duchess of Sussex and wife of Prince Harry) gave birth to a baby boy.

However, things started to deteriorate after this promising piece of glad tiding, as the usual news stories of car bombings and suicide attacks in various parts of the Muslim world started coming through, places such as Pakistan, Baghdad, and Syria. Feel free to also add Palestine, Kashmir, China, and Yemen to the list of terror and despair faced by Muslims across the world. Apologies, I forgot one more: please also include the sabre rattling currently being done by Trump and his administration over Iran, rattling that is backed weirdly by both Saudi Arabia and Israel, providing us with a real world example of the ancient proverb ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend.’

And you also have issues of Ramadan excess. Whilst Ramadan is a month of restraint there are many Muslims who over indulge in their festivities. Ramadan is a month long practice intended to encourage us Muslims to reflect on our daily habits and spirituality through piety and self-discipline. However, the celebrations involved and how they are practiced in the modern era often lead to counter intuitive effects, such as significant weight gain and food waste This food waste can escalate due to a variety of factors ranging from a commercialisation of the holy month, to the generosity of hosts who overcook for events, and to over ordering in restaurants.

The excess problem is such that in Jakarta, capital city of the largest Muslim country in the world, Indonesia, local authorities had to deal with an additional 200 tonnes of waste during Ramadan last year. Over in the UAE, according to their Food Bank project, leftover food waste is expected to go up from an average of 2.7 kilograms per person daily to 4.5kg during Ramadan. The situation in Malaysia is similar, where wastage rises by a third from 15,000 tonnes per week to 20,000 tonnes during this month. Furthermore, a study by market research firm AMRB found that nearly twice as much time was spent cooking during Ramadan than at any other time of year and that there was a 43 per cent increase in the number of dishes prepared at home during the month.

These scenarios are likely to be replicated wherever Ramadan is being observed by a large Muslim population. It can easily be argued that this wastage is in significant contrast to the lessons of the prophet Muhammad who advocated breaking the fast simply with some dry dates and milk. Compare this to a Muslim community that focuses on serving elaborate meals to family and friends as they break their day’s fast. An admirable example of countering this wastage can be found in the UAE where the Ramadan Sharing Fridges scheme allows people to leave cooked food, fresh fruit and vegetables, and drinks, so those in need can help themselves. This beautiful example of a community sustaining itself and cutting back on waste is made even easier this year, all thanks to the ride-hailing app firm Careem who will even come and collect food from your door to deliver to the fridges.

Having said all that, this holy month is still considered a blessed time by Muslims all over the globe, who try to capture the true spirit of Islam throughout these 30 days. And since Ramadan is a tremendous reaffirmation of my Islamic faith, I thought it would be good to share the positive views of others who feel the same way. I will avoid quoting the likes of atheist astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson, who recently tried to tell the Muslim world that they have been fasting incorrectly all this time (silly 2 billion Muslims!), and the likes of female Muslim comedian Sadia Azmat, who somewhat over shared in an article about her personal desires during Ramadan. Instead please find below selected quotes from recent articles that present a sincere and positive view of Islam, Muslims, and Ramadan. Enjoy!

Lagos

The Islamic month of Ramadan is here, and I am excited by the calmness and reflection that this month brings. Ramadan, the ninth month on the Islamic calendar, is considered the holiest month for Muslims. It is a time where we fast, not just from eating food, but also from our worldly desires including things like shopping, or watching television — it’s a time very similar to that of Lent for Christians. This month is dedicated to feeding our souls through reading more, praying more, and being more patient and kind to everyone, while attaching ourselves more to God. It is a month that is dedicated to spiritually grooming yourself to be a better person for the rest of the year — contrary to the bigoted perceptions that exist against Muslims. – Imani Bashir

What I wish more people knew is that the practices and teachings of Islam are rooted in love. For many other Muslims and I, holding onto traditional practices in a society that is becoming more and more secular is important. Ramadan is a part of my culture, whether I’m feeling particularly close to Islam as a religion or not. Because of this, it has become something that grounds me each year. Fasting teaches Muslims self-discipline, patience, and the value of the things we take for granted every day. It’s a time period during which I tap into empathy, compassion, and ultimately how to value these concepts not just one month out of the year, but all the time. Each year, Ramadan seems to arrive when I least expect it, but also when I need its reminders and inspiration the most. Telling me to harness and redirect all the energy I aimlessly put into superficial and immediate gratification, into something greater than myself. Fasting teaches all Muslims restraint and self-discipline. It teaches me that Islam — like the moon when I search for it each night — will always be there. – Nadra Widatalla

Whether it’s in theatre, comedy, sports, music or politics, Muslims are challenging the traditional stereotypes and showing that they are, and want to be, a part of the mainstream community. That’s why I urge people, particularly during Ramadan, to find out more about Islam, increase your understanding and learning, even fast for a day with your Muslim neighbour and break your fast at the local mosque. I would be very surprised if you didn’t find that you share more in common than you thought. Muslims are at the heart of every aspect of society. Their contribution is something that all Londoners benefit from. Muslim police officers, doctors, scientists and teachers are an essential part of the fabric of London. There are valuable lessons that people of all backgrounds can learn from Islam such as the importance of community spirit, family ties, compassion and helping those less fortunate, all of which lie at the heart of the teachings of Ramadan. – Boris Johnson, May 2019, whilst on an official visit to the East London Mosque and London Muslim Centre

Ramadan is a time for contemplation, taking stock of our eating habits and giving to charity. In the western world, we have such an excess of food. We seem to have a culture of ‘living to eat rather than eating to live’. We are fortunate to have so much food at our disposal, whenever and wherever we need. But what about those people less fortunate than us? In many Muslim countries, come sunset when the fast breaks, mosques and restaurants open up their doors and feed the poor for free. I think that’s a wonderful way of giving back. – Parveen “The Spice Queen” Ashraf

The question I get asked most in Ramadan is, “You can’t drink even a sip of water?” People think that models don’t eat anyway, and so Ramadan should be easy, but that’s not true. For a start, you always end up putting on weight because your body craves heavy, greasy carbs at iftar and then you can’t move afterwards. My mum always says when we’re piling our plates up, “You won’t finish that!”…I look after my body and always eat while I’m on shoots, so this month will be a test, but the peace you feel during Ramadan is beautiful. It’s difficult to explain, because most people can’t get past the idea of no food or drink, but you gain so much spiritually. It’s a different, calmer perspective. You put yourself in the shoes of people who live this reality every day and it reminds you to be grateful and patient. – Asha Mohamud, British-Somali model

Ramadan is a time where we remember to give back and try and feel how it feels to be closer to God, and to remember all the blessings that we’ve been blessed with. It’s something that the Muslim community and individuals really look forward to. It’s something that comes from their heart. It’s a time when we find ourselves connecting with God more because we’re starving our bodies but we’re feeding our soul with God. – Haris Ansari

Western society could learn a lot about the struggles of others through the practice of Ramadan. We have a lot of ease in our society, a lot of comfort, but during Ramadan, people all around us are showing self-control and restraint and sacrifice when they practise their religion. It’s about being uncomfortable in your practice of faith, and there’s a lesson in that. During my research for the book, I was very surprised at the lack of science and studies about what fasting does physiologically to the body, especially considering how many people in the world are Muslim and adhere to Ramadan. – Brigid Delaney, author of Wellmania: Misadventures In The Search Of Wellness

Despite the exhortations about being more conscientious during Ramadan, the most shocking thing is that food waste actually rises during the holy month…We need to start recognising the dissonance between what we say Ramadan is, and what we actually do during those 30 days…Fundamentally, the answer is rooted in Ramadan traditions that already exist: share with those who really need the food. The increase in the amount given to charity during the month of fasting is testament to people’s generosity and open-heartedness. It’s also the key to re-thinking how we share our iftars. Instead of having excessive meals on our own, we can think about how to distribute it. – Shelina Janmohamed

This Ramadan, as grown-ups consciously slow down, turn inward and nurture their inner spirit, one of the important responsibilities is to also inculcate in children the true essence of Ramadan. The values of sharing, generosity and charity are as integral to adults as they are to children. In fact, the sooner children are taught these values, the better will they grow up into compassionate individuals. Like a muscle in the body that gets stronger through exercise, compassion too grows with every act done in its guiding spirit. – Jumana Khamis

SWIPE EAST FOR LOVE

I think I may have found my purpose in this world, at least digitally anyway. I came across a phrase that piqued my interest because it kind of describes what I am trying to do with this immensely unsuccessful blog of mine. Earlier this year the American TV host Bill Maher was interviewing Professor Seth Abramson, author of the book Proof Of Collusion: How Trump Betrayed America. Maher was trying to find out what it is that Abramson does in his academic endeavours, specifically about being a ‘curatorial journalist’ and what exactly this means. This is the answer he gave:

We’re in the digital age now and what we find is not that there isn’t enough quality journalism, but that there’s actually so much of it that a lot of it falls through the cracks. It gets published, read once, and then forgotten. So what a curatorial journalist does is they look back decades across media that’s being published across different continents and they see stories that are lost, and how they connect with one another, and how they might be important now but weren’t realized as important at the time. So a curatorial journalist connect the dots. – Seth Abramson, 12 Apr 2019, from an interview on the TV show Real Time With Bill Maher

This answer really got me thinking. Upon hearing the phrase “curatorial journalist” I felt an energy-efficient light bulb go off in my mind. In a similar fashion I also try to look back over decades across different forms of media, collecting quotes that are perhaps lost or not so well known. After gathering these various dots together, I then try to somehow connect them. Even if I am unable to connect them then at the very least I am hoping the dots themselves are interesting on their own accord.

Why my obsession with quotes? I shall avoid saying something cheesy like “I don’t know if I choose the quotes or the quotes choose me.” Instead I shall quote Sy Safransky, editor of a quotation anthology, who said:

Was it worth all the effort? Of course. Great quotations are the wisdom of the tribe. They bridge time and space. They connect the living and the dead. The Talmud says the right quotation at the right moment is like “bread to the famished.” May you be fed. – Sy Safransky

Anyways, enjoy…!

Alis Wedding

There is a Muslim version of Tinder, which is called Minder, and to match on Minder you have to swipe east. – Eshaan Akbar, 18 Apr 2019, from the TV show Frankie Boyle’s New World Order

Islamic fundamentalist sex dolls. Do they blow themselves up? – Jimmy Carr

I don’t want to incur the wrath of Islam…’The wrath of Islam’ sounds like a terrible pub. No booze, no women, no fruit machines. What the hell is this?! – Jimmy Carr

I’m brown…I’m Muslim…I culturally identify as a terrorist. – Usman Enam

Trump, a man who came from everything but brings nothing. – Professor Julia Ott

It is better to live like a lion for one day than to live like a slave for a hundred years. – Afghan proverb, from the 2015 documentary He Named Me Malala

Being president is a weird job. People say “I think the President might be crazy.” “Oh, yeah? So? Well, what do you expect?” Anybody who THINKS they should be the president, there’s your test right there. If you actually think for real, in your head, that you should be the president, then you’re out of your mind! You’re crazy! “I should be the president” to me is like “I should be Thor.” “I think I would like to be Dr Neil Clark Warren of eHarmony.com. That’s what I want.” You’re out of your mind, OK?! These are crazy ideas! “Who should be the most powerful person in America, the Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces and leader of the free world? You know, I gotta say, that sounds like me. It seems like something I would be good at. I can’t think of anyone better than me to be in charge of absolutely everything!” “Because I’m insane” is the rest of that sentence. “Because I’m insane.” – Jerry Seinfeld, from his Netflix stand up special Jerry Before Seinfeld

The Mueller report came out last week. Of course there’s still a lot we don’t know. I don’t want to say that the Mueller report was excessively redacted, but there was so much black on it Trump demanded to see its birth certificate. There was so much black ink the Virginia governor is dressing up as it for Halloween. It was so black Trump thinks it should get the death penalty for a crime it definitely didn’t commit. – Samantha Bee, 27 Apr 2019

It’s really strange because it feels like this argument about immigrants is drifting rightwards. Years ago people were like “I’m not racist but I find sometimes when the call centres phone me, I can’t understand what they’re saying.” And in a way you can kind of see that. But now it’s a case of “I’m not racist but I just batter Polish people on the weekend.” Well that sounds legit! And it’s really hard because where I’m from in north Wales, it’s really rural, it’s very, very white. And I’m trying to explain it to my parents as well, who don’t see any representation unless it’s what they see on the television, and they think they’re right to be scared. I remember at the end of our drive a bungalow came up for sale, and my mum was really scared that Muslims would move in, because she’d heard about them on the news and she was like “I don’t know what to do. What if Muslims live there?” And I was like “It’ll be fine.” And then some Scousers moved in and they kept their Christmas lights up all year, and she was fuming about that. And I was like “Well, if Muslims lived there it wouldn’t be an issue, would it!?” – Kiri Pritchard-McLean, 18 Apr 2019, from the TV show Frankie Boyle’s New World Order

I think it’s important to recognise that these people who voted for Brexit are angry without ever legitmising what they are angry about, or the way that they are doing it. You shouldn’t be angry at immigrants. That is completely irrational to be angry at people who are just as powerless as you. You should be angry at the people who are actually responsible for this, which is the bankers, the chief executives, and all the politicians that are supporting them…The real divide in the UK isn’t between the 48% and the 52%, it’s between the 99% and the 1%. – Grace Blakeley, 18 Apr 2019, from the TV show Frankie Boyle’s New World Order

During the Abbasid Dynasty, a man and his son rode on a donkey. But once they reached the town of Kandahar the people abused them. They said “Poor donkey. You make him carry two fit men.” So the father rode and the son walked. But when they arrived at the next town, people cried “Look at this fellow. He drags his young defenseless boy through the desert heat, and he enjoys the ride of a lifetime.” So in the next town the son rode and the father walked, but people shouted at the boy. “You are young. You are healthy. You make your elderly father suffer. He is marching in the heat.” So, together, the father and his son decided to walk with their donkey. As they passed through the next town, people laughed. “Look at these two idiots. Why don’t they ride their donkey?” And in every town people criticized them. In the end the father said, “Stuff this!” And he and the boy carried the donkey on their back. But…we tie ourselves up in terrible knots, trying to live up to the judgment of others. – from the movie Ali’s Wedding (2017)

THE CULTURE OF THE ISLAMIC WORLD IS PART OF OUR DNA

Alhambra Gardens

The journalist Yasmin Alibhai-Brown has an interesting theory about Muslims. According to Brown, a proud Muslim herself, we have lost touch with our artistic past. We are no longer creative. We have become grey, soulless, conformative automatons who just blindly follow scripture. In articles written several years ago Brown argues that Muslims had a great artistic legacy that is no longer there: “We were once known for our great art, invention, trade and elegance, which helped in the flowering of Europe just as much as Rome and Greece. The Africans selling handbags on the streets of Venice today are only the most recent inheritors of a long history of international commerce that helped make the phenomenal wealth of that city. London, too. Did you know that 300 years before the recent colonisation by Starbucks, places to meet and drink coffee (then called the Mahometan berry) were set up in London by Turks?”

Brown also quotes the Spanish poet and dramatist Federico García Lorca, who said that the Moors (the Muslim rulers of Spain) were “An admirable brand of civilization, of poetry, of architecture, and delicacy unique in the world.” She then deplores: “Look at us today. Iran and Iraq were centres of Islamic arts and culture until vandals of the East and West destroyed both. Islamic countries are so cruel and chaotic that past glories can no longer waken the spirit there. They have extraordinary artists, but they are individual seekers of light in societies lost in pessimism and hungry for kitsch. In our own Muslim ghettos, philistinism and ignorance prevail.”

She goes on to say that “The West regards all Muslims either as terrorists or as ignorant devotees, incapable of rational thought or artistic achievement. Neither sides wants to acknowledge the tight knots of culture which bind them. How ironic.”

Brown further investigated this irony more recently in a 2-part BBC Radio 4 program called From Sensuality To Puritanism: How Muslim Cultures Turned Grey. You know the subject matters covered are deep and personal as part 1 is titled ‘The Vibrancy Of Islamic Culture’ and part 2 is called ‘The Rise Of Islamist Puritanism.’ The two programmes takes us from the early history of Islam to events in the 20th century that saw a shift and a concomitant greying in the lives of Muslims, and most particularly in the lives of Muslim women. Brown asks why the Islamic world that historically represented a vibrant, dazzling and even alluring cultural appeal to the more reserved and conservative West, is now reversing that perception. She also talks to scholars, historians, imams, and others, all of whom seem to remember a less restrained Islamic identity which, in their lifetimes, has been under increasing attack.

Whilst the broadcast is explicit in terms of subject matters covered, the point comes across clearly enough. And to me it seems the point being made goes beyond the desire to wear make-up and mini-skirts, to dance to the music of Prince and Madonna, and to watch superhero and Bollywood movies in cinemas. It goes to what Brown believes is the very heart of Islam and thus to the very heart of what makes all of us Muslims Muslim. In the hour long program she starts by declaring her aims thusly: “I’m trying to understand what happened to that incredible inter-cultural vibrancy and openness of Islam I knew in my childhood. Why does that world now seem so heavily fortressed, defensive, and grey? The very word ‘Muslim’ now conjures veils, segregation, cultural anxiety, rigid social conservatism, and all the qualities that English puritans would have lauded centuries ago.”

And that’s just for starters! She then goes on to ask “how and why Muslim lands and communities have turned from sensuality to puritanism” and why there is a “closing of the Muslim mind.” She “mourns the decline of the Islamic culture we once knew.” She challenges the notion that a Puritanical approach to Islam is a sign of strength. She talks about the increasing power of Saudi Arabia and Iran, where fundamentalist events in the late 1970’s shook both nations and lead to an increasingly hard line approach to religious identity throughout the Muslim world. She reluctantly asks if this fundamentalist tide may yet turn for the better. She talks in historic terms about “the richness of Islamic civilisation” compared to the current “intolerant religious and political dogmatists.”

She says that a “lack of good religious learning leaves Muslims vulnerable” to “the clash between the two Islams, the fundamentalist conservative and the more liberal.” She goes on to wail that the “internal savage clash within Islam makes me and countless other believers feel bereft and disconsolate.” She rues that “Muslims were born free and could live free, with Allah’s blessings” but now we face a “new puritanism” where Islam is “contemporary, puritanical, political, homogenised.”

There is even a brief quote from the internet famous scholar Mufti Menk, about the perils of listening to pop music, a quote that is perhaps taken a little out of context. And then, after spending nearly an hour crying about the greyness of modern Islamic culture, Brown tries to end on a positive note, saying perhaps things are not all bad due to their being “streaks of colour beneath the grey.”

Which is just as well because Brown believes this lost connection to our creative past is something we need to re-establish urgently. In a previous article she has said: “When zealots on both shores can only visualise a dehumanised them and enlightened us, Muslims, cowering between the armies of brutal obduracy, do seek solace in beauty.” And in her radio program she says it is these same cowering Muslims who “In the 21st century…should have more real influence in the arts world.” Given everything that is going on in the world, especially the Muslim world, Brown does acknowledge that hers “is perhaps a petty gripe.” Nevertheless, it is a gripe that I think is important, for fellow artist Saul Bellow has said that “Art has something to do with the achievement of stillness in the middle of chaos.” All the chaos that exists in the world, especially the Muslim world, seems to have its own reality, so it feels urgent and necessary to try and find some stillness, even if it comes through the creative arts.

Examples of just how creative and artistic Muslims of yesteryear were can easily be found in current news media. For example, the book Allah’s Automata: Artifacts Of The Arabic-Islamic Renaissance (800-1200) explores the rich and fascinating world of the automata that were developed and built during the golden age of the Arabic-Islamic cultures, the period from the early 9th to the 13th century. The book describes many wondrous machines built to glorify God.

Also, the journalist Stephennie Mulder recently described in detail the interaction between Vikings and Muslims, and the reason for this rich interaction she says is due to a certain level of respect and reverence shown by Vikings for all things Islamic: “Arabic writing was valued by the Vikings as a mark of social status or capital, much in the way we might today buy a perfume with ‘Paris’ written on it. For the Vikings, 10th century Islamic cities like Baghdad, Cordoba or Cairo were the Paris of their day: glittering capitals of art, scientific knowledge, and culture.”

And then you have the example of students from the University of Minnesota who have installed an exhibit at the Minneapolis Institute of Art, to better showcase the relationship 15th and 16th century England had to the Islamic world. The Tudor Room, installed at the MIA way back in 1923, is an entire period room from the 1600s that was removed from an English Tudor home, including furniture, the ceiling, windows, and wall-panels. The installation, the oldest Elizabethan-period room in America, clearly shows that influences from the Islamic World were evident among many upper-class English households, including colourful textiles and ceramics. Not only that, Queen Elizabeth I of England turned to allies in Istanbul and Morocco after being excommunicated by the pope and establishing England as a Protestant state.

The University students have said that growing Islamophobic rhetoric and actions are just a few reasons why an exhibit that explains how relationships between the Islamic world and Westerners formed is more important than ever. Katie Sisneros, lead curator of the project, said: “We’re trying to illustrate a part of history that most people just don’t know about…By necessity, an exhibit can’t exist in a vacuum. It has to address the world around it. I hope the work we’ve put in has sort of expressed how much that matters to us. The room tells a story that’s as much historical as it is contemporary.”

Furthermore, it seems Brown is not the only one who holds the views she does. Author and intellectual Ziauddin Sardar does not agree with the confines being placed on Islam by some: “My Muslimness is a great source of liberation. It’s also a source of theological liberation.” He also says of his home nation of Pakistan that, because of the hard line shift in faith, “Pakistan is being dehumanised.”

Another academic and author, Dr Usama Hasan, states: “Historically, intellectually, and theologically, Islam has not been anywhere near as narrow, and shallow if you like, as some of the Islamic regimes have expressed it.” And then you have Raficq Abdullah who reminds us that: “We have forgotten the notion of sacredness in the Western world – with consumerism, globalisation and the secular state. Whereas in the Muslim world a sense of sacredness permeates all areas of the arts.”

A time when this sense of sacredness most definitely permeated all areas of not just the arts, but all areas of life, was the golden age of Islam in Spain, back when the Moors ruled the Iberian peninsula. Régis Debray, author of Civilization: How We All Became American, says that: “’Civilization’ is a hard term to define. But while every society has a distinctive culture, authentic civilizations must offer those they subjugate an attractive way of life. Their imprint outlasts their imperium.”

One could argue that the Muslims did not exactly ‘subjugate’ the locals, many of whom willingly converted to Islam over the following few centuries. Whilst it is true that the ‘imperium’ of Islam is most definitely over in Spain, the ‘imprint’ left by the ‘authentic civilization’ of the Muslims is as extensive as it is impressive, even to this day.

This imprint is described in splendid detail by critic and art historian Andrew Graham-Dixon in the BBC TV documentary The Art Of Spain. Part one of this 3-part program is called ‘The Moorish South.’ In it Dixon travels around southern Spain to tell the story of some of Europe’s most exciting and vital art. For 700 years, most of Spain was an Islamic state and the south was its beating heart. Under the Moors Spain became the most advanced, wealthy, and populous country in Europe, and perhaps the entire world. Dixon goes to Cordoba, Seville, and Granada, where he visits beautiful Moorish palaces and mosques to tell us the story of one of the most colourful and sophisticated cultures Europe has ever known.

The documentary is well worth watching in full, with the selected quotes below doing it little visual justice. Having said that, they are well worth a read. Enjoy!


Too often we think of Spain as two weeks on the beach. But there’s another Spain. Spain has produced some of the most startling and original art ever created. Art that has been unfairly overshadowed by the rest of Europe. Art that we know little about. But Spanish art is the art that we need to know about, because it holds the key to understanding all of Europe and its culture. It was in Spain and its empire that so many of Europe’s great battles were played out. Christianity versus Islam. Catholic versus Protestant. Fascist versus socialist.

For many visitors, the south of Spain IS Spain. But away from the beaches there are magnificent sights. Grand palaces, castles, and mosques. Reminders of a different culture from a distant time, a time when Spain was called Al Andalus. What’s often forgotten is that for over 700 years much of Spain was ruled by Muslims and the South was its beating heart. Southern Spain was a unique frontier, where east met west with explosive results. This is the story of how Islamic Spain became one of the most remarkable civilisations ever seen. One that’s shaped Spain and the rest of Europe ever since.

Right at the tip of Southern Spain, a huge rock explodes out of the Mediterranean. But the rock isn’t Spanish. It’s British. And long before Britain owned it, the Rock of Gibraltar belonged to another foreign power, a power that ruled it for nearly 800 years. On the 30th of April in the year 711, an Arab general named Tariq Ibn Ziyad sailed across these waters from North Africa with an army of 5,000 Arab and North African soldiers and invaded Gibraltar. He gave the rock its name, Jabal Al Tariq – Tariq’s Mountain. He used it as the launch pad for the Islamic conquest of Christian Spain. Just 25,000 troops marched across the country, building fortifications as they went. After just three years, the invasion was complete. Only the far-flung provinces of the extreme North resisted, protected by impassable mountains. But the rest of Spain was now part of a vast Islamic empire which reached as far as India. Even its name was changed, from Spain to Al Andalus, and its new rulers were an assortment of Arabs, North Africans, Egyptians and Syrians. The Moors.

Spain was pretty much used to being conquered by foreign invaders over the centuries. The Romans, the Celts and the Visigoths had all had a go at ruling this vast land and, by all accounts, the primitive peoples of Spain had been a bit of a soft touch. But you might have been forgiven for thinking the collision between Muslim invaders and a Christian people would have had some fairly explosive results. And there was an explosion but not of the kind you might expect. It was an explosion of art and culture. The story of this art and culture remains shockingly neglected but I think it’s the key to understanding the whole of Spanish art and its unique intensity.

The first great flowering of Moorish culture took place in the new capital city of Cordoba. By the late eighth century, the Moors had turned Cordoba into the brightest, wealthiest and busiest city in Europe. Its fame reached as far as a quiet cloister in Saxony, where a Christian nun described the city as “the brilliant ornament of the world”. This glittering city was all the work of one young man. His name was Abd Al-Rahman and he was an exile. His family had ruled Damascus in Syria but in the year 750 they were all killed in a brutal civil war. Abd Al-Rahman was the sole survivor of the massacre and he fled all the way from Syria to Cordoba, where he quickly established himself as the Caliph, or ruler, of Al Andalus. His passage through life had hardly been easy but he was to turn out to be one of the most influential figures in world history, someone who kick-started a complete revolution in Western society. He did so by attempting to recreate the splendours of his native Damascus here in Cordoba. He wanted to turn this place into a kind of paradise on earth. Under Abd Al-Rahman, a great civilisation would be born here on Spanish soil.

 [Speaking to Hashim Cabrera, artist and historian]

DIXON: I’m here really to try and find out about Cordoba as it was in the Golden Age.

CABRERA: There were many, many philosophers and artists that were coming to Cordoba for learning. Modern science has many of its roots in this time, in Cordoba. In astronomy and philosophy, in physics, in all [branches of] knowledge. It was like a revolution, like a cultural revolution.

DIXON: So if somebody say around 900 came from Paris or London and arrived in Cordoba, what impression do you think it would have made on them?

CABRERA: It’s like when if now people who are living in poor countries go to New York, or Paris, or London, or Madrid. I think this would have the same impression.

At the heart of Abd al-Rahman’s paradise on earth was the Great Mosque of Cordoba. When work began here in the 8th century, Islam was only a century old, which makes this one of the first mosques ever built. The Great Mosque is a forest of stone columns which seem to go on forever – as far as the eye can see. The effect is a bit like being in a hall of mirrors. You actually feel lost in here, truly disorientated, and that’s the point. The worshipper feels in the presence of something mysterious and infinite, perhaps God himself. In Islam, the direct representation of God or any living being is forbidden. The designers couldn’t use pictures or statues to inspire religious awe, just the forms of architecture itself. And the design of the mosque is uniform throughout, so wherever you stand in this amazing never-ending forest of stone, you feel the same connection to God. Early Islam was a religion without hierarchy, without clergy and liturgy. You just entered the space and prayed. So it was vital for the architects to create a building in which everyone felt equal. This is spiritually democratic architecture.

I found the experience of visiting the Great Mosque really powerful. I think it’s all the more moving when you think about the man who created it, Abd Al-Rahman. We don’t know a great deal about him but we do know that he left us one poem. It’s a poem about a palm tree that he found that had seeded itself somewhere out on the plains of Al Andalus. He saw it as a symbol of himself. He wrote an ode to it. The palm, he said, was like me, it’s an exile. It reminded him of his family. It was a very important symbol to any Arab living in Spain. It symbolised water, shelter, nourishment. Of course, that palm-tree has gone forever but I wonder if this mosque with its endlessly repeated columns, isn’t a thousand palm trees planted here, preserved forever in stone.

But slap bang in the middle of the prayer hall is something profoundly un-Islamic. A Catholic cathedral. In the 16th century, long after the fall of the Moors, Cordoba’s Christian rulers demolished the central columns of the mosque and erected this vast temple to Christianity. A cathedral planted in the centre of a mosque. It’s like a great parasite in its belly. Even the great Catholic Emperor Charles V, who authorised the construction of the cathedral, realised he’d made a terrible mistake. When it was complete he rounded on the architects, saying “You’ve taken something unique and turned it into something mundane.” I think you can still appreciate the beauty of the mosque, but as an act of cultural vandalism, I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s like a sort of dagger plunged into the heart of the mosque. It represents a really heavy-handed imposition of one set of religious values on another and there’s something quite ugly about that.

So much of the later story of Spain would be dominated by religious conflict. But during the Golden Age of Al Andalus, back in its 9th and 10th century heyday, the religious realities were quite different. The extraordinary fact is that here in Al Andalus, uniquely the three religions lived together in relative harmony. Islam regarded Jews and Christians as “People of the Book” whose holy writings were to be respected as forerunners of the Prophet Muhammed’s final revelation. So the conquering Moors made no effort to convince the Christians and the Jews to convert and they even, as the Koran commanded, gave them freedom of worship.

For over 200 years the three religions rubbed along surprisingly well. Friendships and marriages flourished across the faiths. Many Christians and Jews held prominent positions in the Islamic state.

[Speaking to Antonio Manuel Rodriguez, historian]

DIXON: How fully integrated really were these three different religious groups in Cordoba – the Jews, the Christians, the Muslims?

RODRIGUEZ: There’s a lot of talk about three culture living together in Al Andalus. But strictly speaking, there was only one culture, The Andalusi culture. Al Andalus could have a Jewish emphasis, or a Christian emphasis, or an Islamic emphasis. But really, Al Andalus was just one thing.

DIXON: So was this society a kind of paradise on earth?

RODRIGUEZ: It’s true that the civilisation of Al Andalus was the most universally tolerant, inter-cultural and understanding in the history of humanity. I believe it was a golden age of humanity, and that it was the first Renaissance in continental Europe.

The Jewish population of Al Andalus fared particularly well under Arab rule. Under the Christians in the sixth and seventh centuries they’d been persecuted. Under Islam they prospered, becoming successful merchants, reaching the highest positions in government. Nowadays we tend to think of these two great religions, Judaism and Islam, as naturally opposed to one another, but this space is a reminder that it wasn’t always so, that here in Cordoba, once upon a time, Jews and Muslims lived not as enemies but as brothers.

The Christians of Al Andalus were just as keen to embrace Arab culture. Many even converted to Islam. After 300 years of Islamic occupation, 75% of the population had become Muslim. But even those who didn’t convert were profoundly affected by the Arab way of life. They were known Mozarabs, meaning “Arabised”, and they adopted the dress, language and customs of their rulers. It’s hardly surprising that the peoples of medieval Spain should have been so seduced by Arab civilisation. After all, this was a cultural desert. They were leading dour, simple lives and suddenly along comes this vibrant, colourful, sophisticated, but, above all, sensual culture. For me, almost its greatest symbol is the beautiful Arab bath house, a kind of temple of sensual delight.

As well as luxuriating in the bath house, the Moors introduced new fashions, hairstyles and perfumes. They also brought toothpaste and underarm deodorant to the West for the first time. The Moors treated every aspect of life as if it were a work of art – whether it was clothes, or cosmetics, or food. The Moors also introduced to Spain a whole new world of culinary delights. They brought in the idea of eating in courses and they brought with them a whole new range of ingredients that transformed Western European cookery – rice, coffee, sugar, citrus fruits, coriander, basil. And they turned cooking into an art form.

For the Moors, food wasn’t the only part of the dining experience, surprisingly they also enjoyed a drink. The Koran forbids the consumption of alcohol, but we know that it was produced in large quantities throughout Islamic Spain. Alcohol itself is an Arabic word. They used it in cosmetics and in medicine, but they also drank it, and they even introduced a distillation process that would result in that most Spanish of drinks – sherry.

But as well as indulging the senses, the Moors were also intent on developing the mind. Reading was so valued that they turned script itself into a coiling, ornate form of art. The Koran encouraged learning, saying that it brought you closer to God. And the Moors took this decree to heart. Cordoba was full of libraries, one of which was reputed to contain over 400,000 books – ten times more than the contents of the libraries of the rest of Europe put together. The Moors made great advances in philosophy, literature, science and mathematics.

The Arab contribution to Western thought was truly enormous. Among other things it was through Al Andalus that the West re-discovered virtually all of ancient Greek philosophy, through Al Andalus that we got the Hindu-Arabic number system, our number system. The development of logical thought, how we count and calculate – it’s fair to say that the foundations for all of these things were laid in the great centres of Spanish-Islamic learning, like Cordoba.

As you drive round the landscape of Southern Spain, it’s full of a sense of the Moorish past. There are these little castles everywhere, surrounded by tiny, little white villages. But I think it was the landscape that they altered most of all, because whereas for the Romans, Spain had just been the arse-end of Empire, a dry and barren place, to these people from the desert, this was a land full of agricultural possibility, and they brought with them a whole range of techniques for farming dry land – systems of irrigation, canals. They planted out olives and vineyards. And, as a result, there was a huge population explosion. Suddenly people had more than enough to eat, they had more than enough water to drink. Spain really had never had it so good.

And in the countryside outside Cordoba, the greatest symbol of Islamic power and influence in Spain rose out of the ground. These ruins are all that’s left of the most splendid palace ever built by the Moors – Madinat Al Zahra. It was built in the 10th century to celebrate the might of Abd Al-Rahman III, descendant of the great exile who’d founded the Golden Age. In the year 929, Al-Rahman proclaimed himself not only Caliph of Al Andalus, but ruler of the entire Islamic empire. And to celebrate this audacious act of self-promotion, he built this vast palace complex, the size of a city. It was to become the Versailles of Spain, the epitome of the Islamic palace.

Wow. It is fantastically impressive but just think how much more impressive it must have been when this place was in its heyday, and gold and silver and magnificent textiles decorated every surface. Apparently one room even contained a vast, suspended vat full of mercury, and at the caliph’s command a servant would bang it and the mercury would ripple, and light would dance and sparkle on every surface. It must have been a bit like some medieval, Islamic glitter ball. And the guests would reel backwards in awe and terror.

But this city was also meant to touch the soul. In the Koran, the words of Muhammed dictated in the desert, paradise is described as “a garden flowing with streams” and Madinat Al Zahra was built around gardens and water. This was an attempt to create a paradise on earth, a tantalising glimpse of the eternal garden that awaits the righteous. These arches are the same as in Cordoba’s Mosque. Even the colours are the same, red and white – the colours of the Al-Rahman dynasty. But here, power politics are blended with spirituality. And running through it all is the idea of Paradise.

This is the most impressive of all of the rooms in Madinat Al Zahra. It’s the nerve centre of the entire complex, the throne room of Caliph Abd Al-Rahman III, and here it’s as if the idea of Paradise has been set in stone. It’s been allowed to take over the architecture. Look at that great wall of ornamental carving. It’s as if stone itself has been made to go against its own nature and been turned into a kind of plant life. These tendrils and shoots that grow up the wall. You really do feel that you are in a kind of paradise. Plant motifs aren’t the only decoration in this room. The walls are also covered in patterns made from geometry and Arab writing, both loaded with religious significance. In a world in which the depiction of real figures, real life, was forbidden, the Muslim artist had to turn to pattern and elevate it to an art form. And these stunningly intricate forests of decoration are the pinnacle of early Islamic art. Nothing like them survives anywhere else in the world. They’re the Islamic equivalent of the greatest Christian frescoes, but without a human figure in sight. What you really notice about this space is the way in which every square inch has been decorated. Now that’s unique and it would become one of the hallmarks of Spanish Islamic art. It’s almost as if they developed a terror of empty space.

But the glory of Madinat Al Zahra was to be short-lived. Less than 100 years after work on the palace began, it lay in ruins. In the 11th century, civil war engulfed Al Andalus. The dynasty of Abd Al-Rahman, rulers for nearly 300 years, was overthrown. Madinat Al Zahra was sacked and looted. The Golden Age was over. So why did this golden moment come to an end? Well, some blame fierce political rivalry between the various Islamic tribes that made up Muslim Spain from the start. Others say it was due to corruption within the Caliphate itself. But my own favourite explanation was given by the greatest Spanish Arab historian of the time. It’s wonderful, it’s the Orange Grove Theory of History. He said that any society is doomed once it’s becomes wealthy enough, and therefore sedentary enough, to plant orange trees. Maybe in the end they were just undone by their own success.

In 1031, Al Andalus split into dozens of self-governing city states, fighting amongst each other for territory and power. But things were to get far worse. I’ve come to the city of Seville, two hours’ drive to the west of Cordoba. In the 11th century, this became the most important city in Spain, home to a new set of Arab rulers. For the best part of 200 years, Al Andalus was to be ruled by a much more hard line, fundamentalist Islamic regime. Two successive generations of Muslims from North Africa who invaded and took control. Not only were they much more oppressive to Christians and Jews here in Al Andalus, but they also embarked on regular jihads into the Christian north.

The aggressive behaviour of the new regime would soon provoke a mighty confrontation which would explode onto the streets of Seville and engulf the whole of Al Andalus. The stones of this great building have their own vivid story to tell about the epic struggle that took place in Seville. This was originally a minaret, part of the great mosque that stood in the heart of the city. From its summit, the Muslim faithful were called to prayer. Now it’s topped by a renaissance bell-tower, pealing out the message that it’s time for mass. The tower’s a great symbol of the battle that was to convulse Spain for hundreds of years, reaching Seville in the mid-13th century. It was from here in 1248 that the Moors watched as a new enemy laid siege to Seville, an enemy that threatened the Spanish Muslims’ power and their religion. One so feared that the Moors wanted to destroy this beautiful minaret rather than let it fall into their enemy’s hands.

The enemy at the city gates was the Christians, and they were on the warpath. For 300 years, the independent Christian kingdoms of the North had existed in an uneasy truce with the Moors of Al Andalus. But the Christians were getting hungry for power and territory, and provoked by the rise of Islamic militancy, they decided to crusade against the infidel. And so, the reconquest began – a crusade that was to last more than 400 years – a monumentally long and bloody campaign. This conflict would establish a peculiarly fervent form of Catholicism as the Spanish national religion. It was also the conflict from which modern Spain would emerge.

During the 12th century, the Christians painfully edged into Al Andalus and, one by one, the Islamic cities fell. Then, Seville itself was captured in 1248 after two years’ siege. The Christian conquerors of medieval Seville proclaimed “Let us create such a building that future generations will take us for lunatics.” Some statement of intent. So they demolished the great mosque and they put up in its place what the Guinness Book of Records tells me is still the single largest Christian cathedral in the world. A great, crushing symbol of the triumph of militant Christianity. The cathedral’s built in a North European style. Gothic in design, complete with high, vaulting ceiling, flying buttresses and Christian symbols everywhere. This might be the last place you’d expect to find traces of Islamic design. But if you look closely enough, it becomes clear that old habits die hard.

What’s extraordinary about the Gothic style as done by the Spanish, especially the Spanish in the South, is this incredible sense of over-decoration. Look at this altarpiece. It’s almost as if every inch of space has to be decorated. It makes me think of the Moorish terror of empty space. That absolute covering of every inch. Look at this through half-closed eyes and you might almost be in some Moorish palace. I wonder whether the experience of Spanish Christians, especially in the South, wasn’t so permeated by a sense of Moorish pattern and design that this, so to speak, worked itself into the very soul of Spanish art. So that, although this great altarpiece represents the grand triumph of Christianity over the forces of Islam, at the same time it completely expresses a kind of Moorish aesthetic. It’s deeply Spanish, deeply Moorish and Christian all at the same time. There’s really nothing like it anywhere else in the world.

The cathedral isn’t the only building in Seville to bear the imprint of the Moors. This is the Alcazar, a palace fit for a Moorish king. But this building wasn’t meant for Muslims. Instead, it was built for one of Seville’s new Christian kings in 1364. So, what kind of self-respecting Christian monarch would build himself a palace that looks like this? His name was Pedro the Cruel and, boy, did you have to be cruel in the bloody world of medieval Spain to earn yourself a stand-alone nickname like that. Among other things, Pedro was a rapist and a mass murderer. He murdered his own brother in this room and he also murdered a visiting Arab dignitary who was foolish enough to come here with the largest ruby in the known world. Having nicked it from the corpse, Pedro then gave it to Edward the Black Prince, and it’s now part of the British crown jewels. I like the thought that every time there’s a coronation in Britain, the ritual is stained by a drop of blood shed in this room.

Although he was keen on murdering Moorish kings, Pedro was a massive fan of Moorish architecture and decoration. When he decided to build his own Moorish palace, no expense was spared. The best Moorish craftsmen were employed to create an architectural jewel complete with intricate marble and wood carving, cool, shaded courtyards and tile work in almost hallucinogenic patterns. But why would a Christian conqueror dress up his palace in the style of the Islamic foe? You have to put yourself in Pedro the Cruel’s shoes and think back to 14th century Europe. What else is going on in architectural terms? There’s the Gothic, but that’s for churches. When it comes to palace architecture, there’s really nothing to compare with this for colour, richness, pattern, sensuality. The whole place feels as if it’s made of icing sugar. I almost feel as if I want to eat it. It’s the ultimate Arabian Knights fantasy architecture. If I had my own little Aladdin genie in a bottle and I could wish for anything in the world, I might just choose this palace.

Because the Alcazar was a palace, not a mosque, it didn’t arouse the usual suspicions of Muslim worship. And the Christian kings of Spain clearly felt free to love this place, too. Later monarchs preserved it and made any additions with surprising sensitivity. Sometimes, the greatest compliments are those paid to you by your enemy. It’s a pretty astonishing tribute to the power and grandeur of Islamic art and architecture that generation after generation of Spanish Catholic monarchs should have allowed this place to remain, to stand as a great, shimmering ghost of a culture they were determined to eradicate but could never quite bring themselves to stop loving.

Moorish styles remained fashionable in Christian Spain. So much so that if you were a craftsman, you were given special treatment. But life for other Moors was getting a lot harder. Most fled to the extreme south of Spain, where the last bastion of Moorish might clung on to power. Those who remained were forced to convert or go underground, where they mixed with other outcast cultures, like the Jews and the gypsies. These different groups of outsiders – Moors, Jews, gypsies – came together in down-at-heel parts of town like Triana in Seville. Here, their different musical traditions fused together to create a style that would eventually resurface, so it’s said, as flamenco.

Nobody knows for sure which parts of flamenco come from the Moors, though there are many theories. They brought the guitar to Spain, destined to become the nation’s favourite musical instrument. And the distinctive dance style of flamenco, in which dramatic arm and hand movements are favoured over the legs, is similar to Moorish dancing, which forbade women from drawing attention to their legs. And the singing style is similar to the wailing Arabic style. Even the word flamenco itself comes from an Arab word – felagmengu, meaning fugitive peasant. And flamenco is, above all, the music of the dispossessed.

I’m on the last leg of my journey and I’ve come south of Seville, up into the hills. By the end of the 13th century, the once-mighty empire of Al Andalus had shrunk to this small, mountainous region. This was to be the last battlefield of the centuries-long conflict between the forces of Islam and the forces of Christianity. The city of Granada was the last Moorish capital of Al Andalus – the last city to hold out against the reconquest. The Nasrid dynasty ruled from here, managing to resist Christian invasion for nearly 200 years. Though today, you’d be forgiven for thinking that the Moors still run Granada.

If you’re in the mood, you can an Arabic bath in one of the city’s many Moorish bath houses. After taking the waters, you can visit a Moorish tea house and take some tea. And then if you’re feeling peckish, a trip to a Moorish restaurant is in order. It’s all very atmospheric, even if it is completely fake, a confection to put the tourists in an appropriately Moorish mood. But the one really authentic Moorish experience is to be had in the ultimate Moorish palace – the Alhambra.

Even here, you can’t get away from the tourists. Over 6,000 people visit this extraordinary series of royal palaces every day, to hear tales of the Nasrid kings who used to live here. And what bloodthirsty tales they are! According to legend, the Alhambra was built by Christian slaves imprisoned in dark dungeons. And at least nine of the Nasrid kings were murdered by methods as dastardly as drowning, stabbing, and eating poisoned batter.

The Alhambra is above all a palace of myths and legends. It’s a place where people feel a profound need to tell stories, partly to explain to themselves the nature of this place. For example, it’s said that the Sultan used to sit here on his throne. It is said that this door here is a false entrance designed to put off would-be assassins, although everything we know about the bloody history of the Nasrid dynasty suggests that assassins were not to be easily fooled. They usually got their man. The truth is that we know almost nothing about the precise functions of each of these spaces. The only thing that we can be certain of is that the art and the architecture here is absolutely breathtaking.

The Moors might have been coming to the end of their power and influence in Spain, but they were determined to go out in style. The Alhambra is like a greatest hits of Moorish design, with the volume turned up to ten. It’s the absolute summation of everything that made the art of Islamic Spain so extraordinary. A place where the expression of power and deep spirituality, that eternal search for paradise, are absolutely intertwined.

There’s such a scrum of tourists in the Alhambra today that it makes it pretty difficult to appreciate this place as it was originally meant to be appreciated, which is as a space of contemplation and reflection. Each of the spaces in this palace were meant to bring you closer to God, and that’s the fundamental purpose of this wonderful room called the Hall of the Ambassadors, which is all about pattern and geometry. The numbers seven and four are repeated everywhere in this space. Seven signifying the stages by which the soul ascends to God, and four representing the number of areas into which the vault of heaven could be divided, and we see that reflected in this magnificent ceiling. But the seven and the four lead us ineluctably to the one, and that’s the message that’s reinforced in all of these inscriptions. “There is no God but Allah”, “There is no conqueror but Allah.” This is a space that’s designed hypnotically through the repetition of pattern and design and inscription to focus our minds solely and exclusively on the higher reality of God.

But it’s not just the decoration of the Alhambra that invokes God, the very design of the architecture is permeated by the spirit of Islam. It’s a fundamental tenet of Islam that there is no God but God, there is no reality other than His higher reality, everything we experience in this life is impermanent, insubstantial. But how do you introduce the idea of impermanence into architecture – the most stable of forms? Well, here at the Alhambra, they’ve done it by introducing water everywhere. Seen in reflection, even the most solid of things seems ephemeral, shifting. In fact, the whole design of the Alhambra is aimed at making the palace appear to be not quite of this world. The columns are so slender that the arches they support seem to float in the air. And the intricate wood and stone carving makes solid materials seem to dissolve into fragile lace.

I think there’s a wonderful paradox about the architecture of the Alhambra, which is that you get all this effort to create a sense of effortlessness, this tremendous intricacy of structure to create the feeling of a structure that’s on the point of its own disappearance. Look at that wonderful, honeycomb vaulting in the ceiling of this space. Standing in here, it’s almost as if you’re standing at the bottom of a glass of fizzy water, looking up and watching the bubbles sparkle off towards infinity. I think there’s something very moving about the fact that the Moors created a building that seems to be on the brink of disappearing, just as their own civilisation was about to vanish from Spain. The Alhambra today really is the ghost of the ghost of what it was once was. But visiting it is still an extremely powerful and poignant experience. This was the last hurrah of Islamic civilisation in Spain. The very last expression of that beautiful ideal of paradise.

In 1469, Christian Spain was finally united, when the Catholic monarchs, Ferdinand and Isabella, married. Hungry to rule over a completely Christian nation, they launched a final assault against the Moorish south. And on the 2nd of January 1492, after ten years of fighting, the last Nasrid king, Muhammed XII, surrendered the province of Granada and the Alhambra. Legend has it that as the defeated Muhammed gazed back at the city he’d surrendered, he burst into tears. His mother, unimpressed, snapped at him “You do well to weep like a woman over what you failed to defend like a man.” The Moor famously sighed his last sigh, and turned his back on Granada forever. The Christian Reconquest was complete. The victors were merciless towards the vanquished. Ferdinand and Isabella made it law that pork should be eaten throughout the region. Then, in 1492, they expelled all Jews from Spain and revoked the rights of Muslims. In 1526, Arabic was banned. And then, in 1610, all Moors were expelled from Spain, whether they had converted to Catholicism or not.

As so often, the victors in this epic struggle re-wrote history to suit their own militant ideology. For centuries afterwards, the whole rich history of Arab Spain was destined to be remembered as no more than the nation’s long journey through a dark tunnel, at the end of which shone the light of the Christian Reconquista. And the Arabs themselves were remembered as no more than pantomime villains in a great story of Christian triumph.

Today, in festivals all over Spain, the Moors are still portrayed as pantomime villains. I’ve come to the small town of Quentar, just outside Granada, to watch the local “Moors and Christians” festival. Every year, the people of the town dress up and re-enact the historic battle between Christianity and Islam. The whole thing goes on for three days until the Moors are finally defeated, forced to convert, and baptised. To the outsider, it does all look just a bit puzzling.

Of course, it is all just a bit of fun, but it does seem a bit depressing that these re-enactments completely ignore the cultural achievements of the Moors. But I think things have begun to change in modern Spain, and it is a culture more accepting of Islam. After all, there are now over one million Muslims living in Spain. And there are 500 mosques. The newest one is here in Granada, directly opposite the Alhambra. On this spot, modern Spain quite literally faces its Islamic past, the distant world of Al Andalus.

Al Andalus is part of the lifeblood of modern Spain, it’s part of what makes the Spanish Spanish. But the fact is that Arab culture has played a vital part in shaping what we often think of as Western civilisation. Its music, its art and architecture, its philosophy. Yet Spain is almost the only place in modern Europe where you can still touch that history, where you can still almost physically grasp the fact that the culture of the Islamic world is part of all of our DNA.

THE NEWS IS JUST A STRING OF UNRELATED WORDS

Dream Big

We do find ourselves in such a sad, sorry state of affairs. Last night my family and I watched the terrible news of the Catholic cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris burning down to ruin, consumed by dancing orange flames that were destroying one of the most iconic and visited buildings in the world, all live in ultra HD. However, we only seemed to have one thought that was collectively going round and round in our minds. The four of us sat there thinking that if this is a deliberate act, if this is the work of one person, then please Lord, please don’t let be a Muslim.

Aside from this tragedy there have been other things happening. The chronicles of Trump continue unabated, Islamophobia continues to rise and rise, the aftermath of Christchurch still ripples through the news, the futility of Brexit continues roil the UK as it is extended ad infinitum, America is in the throes of its most contentious debate about immigration in recent memory, Ilhan Omar continues to be demonised completely out of context, and so much more.

In my own futile attempt to better understand this ever-changing and always-expanding cultural zeitgeist, here are some quotes that I have collated recently. All said subject matters are covered. Will these quotes shed new light on the ongoing craziness? I doubt it, but they just might. Either way, enjoy…


Brexit is short for “brain exit,” the official word for when everything that makes sense goes out the window, and everyone is just stupid all the time. – John Oliver, Apr 2019

Trump is the Republican id personified, driven to express the impulses and desires of conservative politics in their basest form. That dynamic has been on clear display for the past few days, as the president of the United States leads a campaign of racist demagoguery against Representative Ilhan Omar of Minnesota, a Somali-American Democrat and one of the first Muslim women elected to Congress…It is easy to tie these attacks to Trump’s history of anti-Muslim rhetoric. But anti-Muslim prejudice was common in Republican politics before he stepped on the political stage with his “birther” charges against President Barack Obama…Trump has simply brought this rhetoric to the bully pulpit of the American presidency. He has taken everything coursing through the last 20 years of Republican politics and made it explicit. It now has an official seal of approval. And if Omar is a target, it has little to do with what she said and everything to do with who she is: A black Muslim woman — and an immigrant — whose very person disrupts the exclusionary ideal of a white Christian America. – Jamelle Bouie, Apr 2019

The essence of Islamophobia in America today is the belief that Muslims are inherently disloyal or un-American: that their religion is incompatible with “American values,” and that Islamic theology necessarily pushes individual Muslims to support terrorism or commit terrorist acts themselves. – Zack Beauchamp, Apr 2019

The Age of Trump is an age whose signature feature isn’t populism or nationalism or any other –ism widely attached to the president. It’s the attempted annihilation of shame…In days bygone, the prescribed method for avoiding shame was behaving well. Or, if it couldn’t be avoided, feeling deep remorse and performing some sort of penance. By contrast, the Trumpian method for avoiding shame is not giving a damn. Spurious bone-spur draft deferment? Shrug. Fraudulent business and charitable practices? Snigger. Outrageous personal invective? Sneer. Inhumane treatment of children at the border? Snarl. Hush-money payoffs to porn-star and centerfold mistresses? Stud! – Bret Stephens, Apr 2019

Actor Jim Carrey got into a twitter feud this week with the granddaughter of Benito Mussolini, because that’s just the kind of thing that happens now and we all have to accept it. News at this point is just a string of unrelated words, like ‘Elon Musk Releases Harambe Rap.’ Or this actual headline I read today, ‘Disabled Chicken Who Survived Weasel Attack Learning To Walk Thanks To Custom Wheelchair.’ Guys, just eat the chicken. – Colin Jost, Apr 2019, from the TV show Saturday Night Live

Things are not in good shape…The whole country is going through some sort of spiritual and emotional crisis. College mental health facilities are swamped, suicide rates are spiking, the president’s repulsive behavior is tolerated or even celebrated by tens of millions of Americans. At the root of it all is the following problem: We’ve created a culture based on lies…No wonder it’s so hard to be a young adult today. No wonder our society is fragmenting. We’ve taken the lies of hyper-individualism and we’ve made them the unspoken assumptions that govern how we live. We talk a lot about the political revolution we need. The cultural revolution is more important. – David Brooks, Apr 2019

Because apparently people are so quick to take offence these days, you have some people who say things like “Everyone’s offended at everything these days.” And in response you think “It’s because you’re hearing from different people that you didn’t have to hear from 10 or 15 years ago, people who now have a platform that they never used to have. And so what you’re actually saying is ‘Years ago I didn’t have to listen to any objections to what I’ve said, and now I’ve got to listen to some objections, and because of that I’ve got to think about what I’ve said, and I’ve got to justify what I’ve said.'” – Richard Osman, Apr 2019, from the TV show Frankie Boyle’s New World Order

I think we’ve got to a really dangerous position where, now, if someone like me who is anti-racist and anti-racism, is in a debate, there is this is need to put me on against a racist, as if racism is like a legitimate opinion. If we were talking about rape, if we were talking about the problem of rape, you wouldn’t have me on TV with a pro-rape activist. You just wouldn’t! You would accept that pro-rape is not a legitimate stance. But when it comes to racism, pro-racism now apparently is so normalised that I find myself having to debate people who are openly and overtly racist. And I think it’s really worrying because it does send a message that these two positions are equal, and we are just having a healthy debate. – Afua Hirsch, Apr 2019, from the TV show Frankie Boyle’s New World Order

Believe it or not, I don’t actually enjoy having to explain that black people are human beings, that the kinds of black kids likely to fall into violent crime come almost exclusively from a very particular set of circumstances, obviously. And those circumstances are the same as the white lads in Glasgow or Liverpool who are likely to fall into violent crime. I don’t enjoy having to explain in the 21st century that simply you being black is not a predeterminant of your behaviour or your future or your aptitude. – Akala, Apr 2019

In the Black Lives Matters era so many white folks do feel judged, first and foremost by their white skin, that so often these days they’re saying why should I give a damn about the content of my Presidents character? In other words, it’s you progressive people who are violating that whole civil rights covenant that you fought, or your people fought so hard to get my people to adopt. So there’s a turning of the tables these days…There are a lot of young men today who are feeling humiliated, and that’s a big word I know, the h-bomb, humiliated by all of the changes that are happening in society, that they feel is being imposed on them. For example, the kind of culture of casual cruelty, and sometimes not so casual cruelty that we’re living in today, means people like me who were once thought to be marginalized but now effectively have these great platforms in our culture, if we continue to tell white men “You’re an idiot, you’re stupid, you have your head up your ass, you’re the exemplars of white privilege, of white supremacy, of white fragility…” The point of course being that that kind of bullying is going to strip people of dignity, regardless of what privilege they come from. So don’t be surprised when the people who are being shamed, blamed, and gamed, don’t follow your rules. Don’t be surprised when you get backlash. – Irshad Manji, Mar 2019, from the TV show Real Time With Bill Maher

Every single day people like me are subject to a media onslaught. Every single day we are demonised, both by the people who make our laws and by the people who have significant influence over public opinion. And when I say “we”, I don’t just mean Muslims. Because it’s not just Muslims who are losing their lives at the hands of far-right nationalism. It’s Jews and Sikhs and black people. Because when fascism comes to call, it usually doesn’t care what shade of “different” you are. All it knows is that you are different, and it does not like you for it. My fury and my pain is not lessened when a Jewish person is killed, or when a Hindu person is killed. We share a common humanity and that is sufficient for us to feel rage and pain. And it is evident that very many people do feel a sense of shared humanity with those targeted in attacks. Those emotions are not specific to people of colour, or to religious minorities. – Masuma Rahim, Mar 2019

If our politics is becoming less rational, crueller and more divisive, this rule of public life is partly to blame: the more disgracefully you behave, the bigger the platform the media will give you. If you are caught lying, cheating, boasting or behaving like an idiot, you’ll be flooded with invitations to appear on current affairs programmes. If you play straight, don’t expect the phone to ring. In an age of 24-hour news, declining ratings and intense competition, the commodity in greatest demand is noise. Never mind the content, never mind the facts: all that now counts is impact. A loudmouthed buffoon, already the object of public outrage, is a far more bankable asset than someone who knows what they’re talking about. So the biggest platforms are populated by blusterers and braggarts. The media is the mirror in which we see ourselves. With every glance, our self-image subtly changes…On both sides of the Atlantic, the unscrupulous, duplicitous and preposterous are brought to the fore, as programme-makers seek to generate noise. Malicious clowns are invited to discuss issues of the utmost complexity. Ludicrous twerps are sought out and lionised. – George Monbiot, Mar 2019

Pity poor political journalists like me trying to make sense of the situation — sometimes I think you may as well ask a random bloke down the pub…Right now, your guess is probably as good as mine. – Sophy Ridge, Mar 2019, referring to Brexit negotiations

Fox News almost seems to racially profile truth, as if all truth is bad. – Nick Pemberton, Jan 2019

Trump hangs on only because he knows the ruling class has no moral authority anymore. Enough whining about the truth. If you want people to believe the truth, give them an education, or better yet, a roof over their heads. Until that happens, expect the scapegoating of immigrants and all the lies behind it to ring true. And the biggest crime will not be the lie that brought us over the edge, but the condition created that fostered a society where truth did not matter anymore. There are more desperate needs here so when a man like Trump says he can help we do not ask him if he is telling the truth, we only ask how we get to somewhere, anywhere better. – Nick Pemberton, Jan 2019

Ramadhaan 2019 – Some Useful Resources

Kaba pic

We are nearly at the start of the month of Shabaan (moonsighting.com), which means the month of Ramadhaan is just around the corner. Preparations for this blessed month should ideally begin now.

For me this month is an intense spiritual period where we Muslims step up a gear, where we try to be a better version of ourselves compared to the previous 11 lunar months. I remember reading Ramadhaan being described as ‘high altitude training for the soul.’ In our fast-paced world of hyper-consumption, Ramadhaan is a welcome chance to practise restraint. Ramadhaan is the opposite of indulgence and as such it is a month where we can engage in self-reflection and mental self-flagellation, and hopefully emerge some thirty days later a better person, less prone to excess, less rapacious. Hopefully.

This is the month where we use the power of fasting to check ourselves before we wreck ourselves. This month is when we Muslims try to rebalance our spirituality, in order to gain further insight into our faith, a concept best expressed by the Muslim caliph Imam Ali:

Conquer your lustful desires and your wisdom will be perfected. – Imam Ali

With this intention, I am hoping the following list of resources and quotes can insha-Allah (God willing) help us all to make the most of this holy month, myself most definitely included…


Information about the month of Shabaan…

Please see the following PDF file about the month of Shabaan, from the excellent book The Best Of Times by Muhammad Khan. Please read this in order to make the best of this blessed month, and to prepare ourselves for the main event of Ramadhaan.


Islamic lectures…

An excellent lecture about Ramadhaan is Preparing For Ramadan by Shaykh Zahir Mahmood (scroll down the kalamullah.com page please in order to get to this particular lecture).

Another excellent lecture is from Shaykh Hamza Yusuf called Ramadan Advice.


Websites…

A useful website with loads of really good practical hints and tips is http://productivemuslim.com.

I came across a really good website where if you type in a post code it will show you the qibla direction: http://www.qib.la/.


Files…

Five files that will insha–Allah provide some good information:

Complete Guide To Ramadhan

Laylatul-Qadr – guide

Ramadhaan checklist

Ramadhaan preparation pack

Ramadhaan Ashra Duas


OVERALL…

Know that you only get out of Ramadhaan what you are willing to put in. Therefore please make time to read the articles and listen to the lectures highlighted above, before Ramadhaan begins.

To hopefully inspire us all further, here are some quotes related to Ramadhaan and fasting:

We have become like gerbils in the dunya, chasing after things…The job of the dunya is to make you unstable…the more you become immersed in this dunya, the more you become invested in this dunya, then the more unstable you become…Some scholars have said that jahiliya is to see something and to perceive it as something else, that this is ignorance…in Islam true knowledge is to perceive something as it really is, as best you can…people who immerse themselves in this dunya have immersed themselves in a lie, and they are getting played like a piano on Sunday school, and that is why they are not stable…this dunya calls you to become people who are completely insecure with themselves…Fasting and Ramadhaan call us to be stable. – adapted from a speech by Imam Suhaib Webb

Ramadan is not a temporary increase of religious practice. It is a glimpse of what you are capable of doing every day. – Shaykh Abdul Jabbar

The less fasts certain people keep during Ramadhaan, the more eager they seem to be to celebrate Eid. – Anon

This month of Ramadan is about asking “Where is your heart?” Is your heart with God? Is your heart with your own ego? Is your heart with your lust? Is your heart with your passion? Is your heart with your greed? Is your heart with your pride? Is your heart with your envy? Is it with your resentment? Is it with your desire for revenge? “Where is your heart?” That is the question this month is asking us: “Where is your heart?” And this time that we have been given, a few days of reflection, this is the time when you can actually go into yourself, and dig into yourself and ask that question: “Where is your heart?” Because as Sayyidina Ali said “A man lies hidden under his tongue”, because the tongue expresses what is in the heart…“Whoever loves a thing does much remembrance of it”. If you love Allah, God is on your tongue. If you love the world, the world is on your tongue. That is the question: “Where is your heart?” This is the time to return to God, to give the heart back to the One who possesses the heart… – Shaykh Hamza Yusuf, from a speech entitled Ramadan Advice

What motivates you? What makes you tick? This is what our Prophet (SAW) called niyah (intention). What is your intention? What is your niyah? What do you want when you’re doing something? What’s your intention for fasting? What is your intention for giving money? Once you begin to address the essence of your own being, you can begin to understand who you are, and that’s why self-knowledge is foundational in our religion. If you don’t know who you are, you’re certainly not going to know whose you are. – Shaykh Hamza Yusuf

The most common question I get from people of different faiths has to be why we fast. Many people answer this question with a response, “to feel how the poor feel when they have nothing to eat.” Personally, I think that since fasting in Ramadan is not that difficult, it is almost an insult to claim that it is to feel the poor’s hunger. The hunger they feel is much greater, especially since they may not know when their next meal will come. Fasting is a means to gain something called Taqwa. Taqwa is an Arabic word that means many things, such as being aware that Allah (our word for God) has full knowledge of your actions and intentions. In Islam, Allah has knowledge of everything we do and even think. Fasting is more than abstaining from food and drink. It is understanding that Allah has full knowledge. And because of this, we must navigate through the world with caution of our actions and intentions – to be good to our fellow human beings and to yourself. All of our deeds and intentions should be virtuous and for the sake of Allah. Ramadan is an opportune time to be able to reflect and be more aware of this. – Dr Magda Abdelfattah, May 2018, from an interview in the Wisconsin Muslim Journal

Religious fasting traditions — from Ramadan (Islam) to Ekadasi (Hinduism) to Yom Kippur (Judaism) and Lent (Christianity) — are meant to unburden believers from day-to-day compulsions, drawing them closer to their conscience…Ramadan is a month-long spiritual odyssey that is meant to rejuvenate us, both physically and morally. It enables us to detach from worldly pleasures to invest our time in intense prayer, charity and spiritual discipline and focus on our deeds, thoughts and actions…The fast is a reminder of the fragility of the human life and is meant to foster a relationship with God…It teaches us about patience, self-restraint, spirituality, humility and submissiveness to God. The act of fasting for spiritual prowess makes us conscious, not just of our food habits, but of our thoughts, behaviour and interactions throughout the day. Ramadan helps us hone our patience because, by refraining from consumption throughout the day, we learn the benefit of refraining from gratifying each of our desires in the moment. – Moin Qazi